I smirk. I don't realize it most of the time, but ppl would ask, "Why are you smirking?" It's often assumed that I am secretly laughing at them.

Well, the truth is, I was just amused, often by myself. Or I can be laughing at myself sarcastically - if I were having a conversation with myself, which I almost always am, I was probably saying something along the line of: "Ah...good job, genius," to myself sarcastically. And it would be followed by an equally sarcastic reply that goes something like, "Oh, shut up, at least it was better than that time I...." You see how it works.

I was smirking a lot tonight, at dinner. A friend I just met at work asked if she can park her car at my parking spot tomorrow. I live 15 mins walk from work and she would need to drive to work tomorrow because of a doctor's appointment. I said yes, of course. For whatever reason, she decided to return the favour by inviting me to dinner, in a chinese restaurant, with her husband and mother-in-law, for... wedding banquet food tasting. For whatever reason, I said, "...Sure, why not."

Somewhere between deciding on peking duck or lobster, I realized this was my first experience at chinese wedding banquet preparation. I never thought it would be under such circumstances. It was slightly weird, picking out wedding dinner dishes with someone I barely know, and in the case of her husband and mother-in-law, never met. It seem like a family event... but then again, I have been involved in many other family's event. I've been to K's grandma's bd, her nephew's full moon, her mom's singing practice... (hmm... no wonder D keep asking if we were dating... I can see that from a westerner's pov now it could rather suspicious.) My point being, many events where ppl decided there would be too much food anyway so why not feed a LS. It was as if I have "feed me" written all over my forehead. Or as if I release some sort of pheromone that signals hunger. (Imagine such perfume, it would have me as spokeperson and the tagline "Can you resist... feeding her?")

I often wonder if another person would feel somewhat embarassed if they were in my shoes. Some one who hasn't been a foreign student for too long... some one who think of an invitation to dinner more than just an invitation to reduce waste... some one who takes themselves more seriously than food. Or just simply someone who has their own family events to attend to.