At the hospital office, this asian lady is at the desk:

Me: I need a new badge... and I have this form.
Lady: What are you?
Me: A post doc.
Lady: *Looks at form* So you are not a hospital employee.
Me: No.
Lady: Alberta Health is not paying you.
Me: No.
Lady: So you are a contractor.
Me: Sure... I work with the robot, with Dr. S, a neurosurgeon.
Lady:?
Me: So I'll be around the OR area...
Lady: What department are you in?
Me: Ah... I don't have one, I don't work for the hospital. I need access because I will be working with Dr. S...
Lady: You have to give me one, it goes on your badge.
Me: Ok...neurology? No, neurosurgery, do you have a department like that?
(Someone standing in line laughed.)
Lady: Yes.
Me: Ok then, that.
Lady: How long will you be here?
Me: Indefinitely.
Lady: I can only give you 1 year, coz you are a contractor.
Me: I'll probably be here longer than 1 year.
Lady: Ok, 2 years, coz you are a contractor. After 2 years you renew.
Me:... ? Ok.

I felt like I bargained my way into getting a badge.